Sunday, December 23, 2018

A little Christmas miracle

People often regale you with stories of miracles happening around Christmastime, but I've often thought that it's just a happy coincidence. Don't get me wrong, happy coincidences are wonderful. But I worry that the word miracle is tossed around loosely, especially at Christmas.

On Thursday, I collided headfirst with a massive obstacle in the form of my babysitter deciding to leave us, with one days notice. I was floored, it felt so out of the blue, I really didn't know what to say. With Christmas coming so soon, I literally had four business days to find full time childcare before school started again.

I knew of a daycare across the street from my kickboxing studio, so I looked up their number and called. The night manager was super sweet and informative, but asked me to call back in the morning to see if there was any space in the toddler class. I was both hopeful and discouraged.

I called five more daycares near my work, but their waiting lists stretched from 5-7 months. The soonest I could even hope to get in anywhere would be May 2019. Discourage quickly eclipsed any hope in my heart at that point.

I perused Care.com, but very quickly realized that any of the candidates would cost me 80% of my paycheck. Oh boy. Sam and I had made a deal long ago about childcare, I would stay home if we had to pay more than 50% of my income.

I had leads for two in-home daycares recommend by friends, but I had to wait until morning for information. One was in West Jordan and the other in Riverton. Sam was discouraged because either option would add 1-2hrs to commuter time every day.

I cried angrily, and my appetite was completely gone. I think I went 24hrs without any food. I felt like a zombie because when I was finally able to doze off, the baby cried and woke me up. Needless to say, I only slept about an hour that night.

Despair.

It felt like the world was over, mostly because for the next 12 hours I was unable to actually start solving my problem. At 3am I got out of bed and tried to keep busy. I did laundry, unloaded the dishwasher, and tried to make decisions. There was a two hour block of time where I legitimately thought about quitting my job. I love my job, but the idea was tempting. Not working would mean more freedom to have another baby without waiting to be eligible for maternity leave. It certainly would be a game changer, but deep down I knew it wasn't what I really wanted.

Hope.

I showered, dressed, and walked to the daycare across from my kickboxing studio. I prayed the whole way, keeping my fingers crossed that I could get on the waiting list, and then go from there. It was 5:30am, and I waited behind another mom and her daughter who rang the bell when I got there. The director let us in, and I asked about space.

Faith.

Because my sweet little boy was an early walker, he fit the parameters to be in the toddler room, which had space available. I paid the application fee as well as tuition, and promised to bring back the signed paperwork later that day. I copied his shot record, signed the dotted line, and my little family dropped it all off before the place closed.

Love.

I am overwhelmed with gratitude. Anyone who deals with daycare will tell you that this is not how it happens. I especially felt the outpour of love from my friends and family who pitched in to help me find a solution. In a moment, I truly understood what it meant to exercise love for each other. Sweet relief filled my heart as I realized the new adventure my family was about to embark on in the new year.

I grew up in daycare, and my experience defined me as a child. Miss Ann, Miss Shirley, Miss Kris, and Miss Sue were all my moms.

I was so lucky.

I had all these amazing women helping me grow up. Now, I do realize that this may be the exception to the rule, but I know Charlie will have an amazing experience too. He will have opportunity to socialize, make friends, and learn that the world doesn't revolve around him.

Daycare opens up the risk for a ton of other things too, such as more exposure to sickness and head lice. But it is no different than the risks of sending him to school for kindergarten.

We are excited and irrevocably grateful.

I am so lucky!

It really is nothing short of a miracle.

Merry Christmas!

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