Write about waiting
The 500 Words
I feel like I do a lot of waiting. I’m probably one of the
most impatient people ever, at least that is what so many people tell me. But
is anyone ever really patient? The waiting for things makes me crazy, because
I’d just assume get something over with instead of sitting around contemplating
the various ways it could or might turn out. School is probably the one thing
that tries my patience and my coping methods the most.
The most prominent waiting period I’ve experienced in the
last year was when I was waiting to hear about graduate school at the
University of Utah. The deadline to apply was at the end of January, and they
would email their decisions at the end of February.
I distinctly remember telling myself that until it was
February, I wouldn’t bother worrying yet. It was nice to have a plan, because
looking back, I can’t imagine letting myself freak out for that long of time
without making myself ill. Finally, I decided to call the department and ask
about when the committee was meeting. They weren’t meeting until the end of
February, and then they would email out their decision.
I began to worry the day after the committee met, and it was
three days later that I got my letter. Those three days nearly killed me.
Waiting for someone else to tell me what my future would be, I had no control,
I’d done everything I could. All that was left to do was to sit, and wait.
I guess, for me, waiting implies doing nothing.
Unfortunately, the only thing you can really do while you wait is worry about
what is coming, or simply distract yourself by staying busy. I feel like in
this case, I did both and for far too long. I spend way too much of my time
contemplating every single kind of scenario, only to have things work out in a
way that I didn’t expect anyway.
I tried to write during my wait. I tried to brainstorm,
theorize, and creatively out think what I had chosen to inflict upon myself.
And by that, I mean, I decided to apply for something, therefore I had to wait
to find out (unless I suddenly didn’t care, which might be something I should
start doing).
Maybe I should stop taking all of these choices so
seriously. I need to remember that everything is an option. I can do anything.
I will always have options. Maybe I need to employ the phrase “Don’t put all
your eggs into one basket.” This should be my new mantra, and maybe the next
time I’m waiting for something, I won’t feel the need to attempt to think of
every kind of option before a decision is made.
There are better ways to spend waiting time other than
worrying, and maybe I need to combo attack those thoughts by not caring as much
and by using better distraction techniques. It can be done.
No comments:
Post a Comment